Buying a house- Neighborworks breakfast

Here's the speech I gave at a Neighborworks fundraising breakfast not long after we bought a house. It went really well. They raised $170,000, which far exceeded their expectations! Everyone told me that my speech was a big reason why. To me it was no big deal- I'm just blessed and excited to share with others how awesome Neighborworks is, so I spoke from my heart.

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Good morning everyone. It's an honor to be here today and to be able to share my
family's story and experience with neighborworks. If you had told my wife and I a year ago
that I'd be here this morning talking about buying our first home, we would have never
believed you.

Behind me now is a photo of my family in front of our new house that we just moved into
last month. Anyone who has ever bought a house knows what an amazing feeling it is
walking in for the first time knowing that it's yours. Right now, it's a house, but in time it's
going to become a home­ our home.

We first moved to Lincoln just over 2 years ago so I could pursue a career in video
production. Lindsay was a stay­ at ­home mom with our two kids, Judah, who is 4, and
Olivia, who is 3. Our apartment was nice...but we couldn't paint it the colors we wanted.
My kids didn't have a backyard to play in. My wife couldn't have a garden and she loves
gardening! At the end of the day it wasn't home. It was just building 8640, unit A.

We thought about buying a house, but when it came down to it, we just didn't know
anything about what it took. The whole process intimidated us, and in our minds it
seemed unattainable. We had some savings but not what we thought we'd need to get
into a place that was any better than our apartment. We felt stuck.

So Lindsay and I got frustrated and said, "Forget it!" Our 5th anniversary was coming up
and we decided the most logical thing was to blow through our savings and go on a crazy
anniversary trip, anywhere we wanted to in the world. There was a major issue though,
and that's that I don't actually like spending a lot of money.
We started out by looking at going to Europe or Australia, which was really expensive.
Then we started looking at California or New York, which was still really expensive. We
ended up going to Denver! It was an amazing trip, and most of our savings stayed in tact.

When we got back we decided to give this home­ownership thing another look. As I
mentioned, I don't like spending a lot of money. We did some simple math at realized that
if we stayed in our apartment we'd be spending $45,000 on rent over the next 5 years.

That's $45,000 dollars we'd never see again. If you could all visualize with me for a
second, a pile of $45,000 in cash in your front lawn. Then imagine that pile being set on
fire. When I started thinking about it that way I knew it was time to get out of our apartment. I
realized that if we could afford to buy a house it would be a really wise investment over
time.

We had no clue where to begin. But then a co­worker told me about a program called
Neighborworks. Everything she said sounded good, but I kept thinking that it all sounded
too good to be true. There had to be a catch. But the more I looked into it, the more I
realized that there wasn't a catch, and that it was a program that was genuinely all about
helping first­time homebuyers like us.

That's when the whirlwind began. We met with a realtor in June and he suggested
neighbor works as well. We signed up and took the classes in July. The classes were
phenomenal. There was a ton of information, but we needed a ton of information! We
walked into our first class knowing almost nothing about the process of buying a house,
and when we walked out of our last neighbor works class we felt like we were ready to
buy a house that day...if only the bank would have let us.

As soon as we finished classes we started looking at houses. Neighborworks not only
helps new homebuyers fix up old houses, but they also build brand new ones. We started
by looking at those first and saw one we really liked. It seemed like a perfect fit and we
didn't even need to waste time look at anything else. All we had to do was wait for it to be
finished.

That was in August, and on October 15th we officially closed and moved in. Without
Neighborworks, we probably would have waited a few more years to buy a house when
we were actually ready now and didn't know it. Since we moved in we've already painted
the walls the colors that we selected. My kids have their own back yard to play in and they
love it. My wife can start a garden next spring. I'm even making plans for a man cave in
our basement.

We love our neighborhood so far, and we hope that as we turn our house into a home we
can also get to know our neighbors and help make our neighborhood a better place. You
know, Lincoln is an amazing community, and great communities start with great
neighborhoods. Neighborworks isn't just about fixing up old houses and building new
ones­ it's bigger than that. Neighborworks is helping families like mine have a home, and
in doing so they're improving neighborhoods and ultimately our community. Thank you!

2014

Time is a strange reality. Somehow it fools you into thinking that it's moving slowly only for you to suddenly wonder where it's gone. 

That happened to me in 2014. It was an amazing year in my life. Yet it's already nearing an end, and it will simply be boxed up in my memory and stacked away somewhere in my mind. 

It's hard to begin, really. I suppose the most satisfying outcome of this blog post if the future me is reading this is to put down some things that come to mind as I reflect over this past year, while also expressing how I feel in this very moment early in the morning of December 13th, 2014. 

So let's start with this- the biggest milestone and life change in this past year is buying a house. Lindsay and I love our house so far. Being a new homeowner is intimidating at times, but also feels like it's what we're supposed to do. After living in an apartment for the past 2 years, and in a trailer at camp that wasn't ours before that, I can truly say that having a place to call our own is simply...refreshing. We moved in back in October, and I'd say that I'm still adjusting to life as a homeowner. Getting into the house was a little more expensive than planned, which is common, but right now we need to pay some bills. I'm hoping that in the coming months we'll be able to get on more solid ground in that regard. 

In 2014 Judah and Olivia grew up more- Olivia especially. We started to see the goofy side of her personality at a very young age, and this year she really started to grow into it. Every day she makes us all laugh. And this week she finally got potty-trained! I was starting to wonder if it would ever happen, since every time I sat her on the toilet she'd whine and cry. I'm just mostly excited to save some money on diapers :)

Both Judah and Olivia are extremely smart. They both know their ABCs, Olivia can count to 20 and Judah can count to at least 50. Judah can also write all of his letters. The other thing that really impresses me about Judah is what he builds with his legos and train tracks. He comes up with track configurations that I don't think I could have ever though of. It's very impressive.

As for me, I work a lot. I love making videos and storytelling through video. Over the past year I've improved a lot. Reliant and Berean had plenty of work for me to do throughout the year, and I did my biggest freelance project ever for Preferred Popcorn this fall. I also filmed around 15 weddings. It was an insanely busy year. I'm guessing I was involved in somewhere around 100 video projects on some level, but who's counting? I'm hoping I find a little more balance in the future because right now I'm pretty worn out. I've always been a person that's very driven to improve constantly, and I still am, but I could be getting a little burnt out. Everyone has their limit...and this year I learned that I've got a pretty high threshold of work I can take on, but I also have a limit. Another challenging aspect that I've faced since doing freelance work is time off. I never have a day off. Sure, I have "days off" where I don't really work, but on those days I usually feel guilty that I'm not getting work done, which in turn discourages me and makes me not want to work, which makes me more guilty. All that to say- I LOVE what I'm doing and I feel so blessed that I get to create through video for a living. It's awesome...but not perfect...and there's a lot I can take away from 2014 and hopefully learn in the future to make sure that I keep loving it and stay motivated.

So there's that. This post is a little dry but it's late and I'm trying to summarize one of the craziest years of my life in less than a million words. It can't be done. 

One other quick thought. I love Lincoln. It's an awesome town and I'm really enjoying the people that I'm getting to know. But there's another aspect, and that's that 4 of my closest friends live here, plus some other good friends I grew up with. I was just thinking about that last night as I came home from a "bro night." How awesome is it that some of my bros that I grew up with in small town Nebraska also ended up in Lincoln? I've been super busy and haven't really taken advantage of it like I should. There's something to improve on for 2015.

Another thing I hope to improve on in 2015 is self discipline. Wow, I'm terrible at food. Just terrible. For the past 3 years I've done a "biggest loser" contest to start the year with my in-laws. The contest runs 3 months and each year I've done well. But each year I've done terrible at keeping the weight off. Lindsay and I switched to being "vegan-ish" 2 years ago and overall I've been healthier, but I want to be better. Way better. I compromise- it's super easy to avoid meat. But what I really need to avoid is dairy and carbs. But for some reason that's way harder to avoid. So here's my results from the past 3 years. Year 1- lost 15 pounds, gained back 20. Year 2 (switched to being vegan), lost 25 pounds, gained back 15. Year 3, lost 15 pounds, gained back 15 pounds. ALL CAPS ANGER! I'm sick of it. I want to lose 25 pounds this year and keep the freaking weight off. I can be disciplined for  3 months when there's a contest on the line...but afterwords...I eat a lot of cookies. I can be better. 

The last thought I have in regards to 2014 is how much I like Lincoln Berean. Lindsay and I love attending, and we are both on staff there now. I'm really happy Lindsay was able to get a job there- it truly was God at work to make that happen. She applied and then once we had the details for the job we didn't think it would work. She even called them to have her name removed from candidates for the job. But they called her back a week later and said they really wanted her. They were willing to be super flexible and it worked perfectly with our scheduling needs. It's been a huge blessing for her to get out of the house a couple of days a week and work with awesome people. God is good! I really enjoy my job on the youth staff. It's pretty challenging at times, but I love the challenge and I love knowing that God is directly using my work there to reach and teach kids. Not only that, but I really look up to the guys I work with there on the staff, and I'm blessed to call them friends!

So there it is, a crazy year summed up in a quick blog post. I always say this when I write- but I need to write more often. This isn't anything fancy but it was great to write. As for 2014- you were good to me, and 2015 is just around the corner with the opportunity to love God more and be better.

Compliments

I really have no idea how to take compliments about my video work.

I believe that we are all fragile souls at the core no matter how thick the walls are that we put around our true selves. I've got plenty of walls, and most are thick. But when someone tells me that I'm good at what I do, sometimes it cuts right to that fragile part of my soul and makes me want to break down and cry. If that ever happened, through my tears I would just say "THANK YOU!" It means so much to me to hear that.  I never expect compliments for my work and often times they catch me off guard. My journey just to receive a meaningful compliment has been so long. Most of the time I had no idea what I wanted to do or even how to get there. It all started as a hobby by making videos for fun with my friends for fun and posting them to youtube. I went to community college, not film school. I worked at a camp by myself for 3 years with cheap cameras and 8 year old iMacs. I didn't know what a c-stand was until about 2 years ago. Basically I did almost nothing before I moved to Lincoln that validated me in my work, but I kept going after it because some people believed in me. When it comes down to it, I'm just a guy who loves making videos and wants to keep getting better. The drive I have to be better has only grown as I've improved. It's insatiable. My journey is really just beginning.

Sometimes I have a hard time believing the compliments, because I really struggle to look at my own work objectively. But if it's true and I possess an ounce of talent, I can only credit the God who gave me the talent and is helping me improve. Really, it has nothing to do with me. Don't tell me I'm awesome, because I'm not. Tell God He's awesome. My goal is simply to make the best videos I can with the talent God has given me. It's unreasonable to believe that I can make an awesome video every single time. I'm going fail. As validating as compliments can seem, my only true validation is found in knowing that I'm only able to create because of my Creator. My work is for His glory, not my own.

When the lights go out

Every night the lights go out. And you're alone. Maybe there's someone sleeping next to you that you deeply love. But at a certain point everything is taken away and it's just you, alone in your thoughts as you wait for the mystery of sleep to overtake your consciousness. In this short window of complete solitude, the realization of mortality comes. This life will end. When? We don't know, but the day is coming that will be our last. Is it this week? Is it this year? Will I live to see my grandchildren? What will the death of my body be like? This body that I'm in is merely a house for my soul. Everyone who has ever known me in this world recognizes me by this body that exists only in our physical world, but it's not actually me. If this body is in good enough condition to be shown at a funeral, those attending will look at my body with sadness, as if all that I was ceased to exist. In reality, none of what I was ceased to exist. Yet memories are all that's left of me to those who knew me in this body. Those memories are fragile shadows of reality that will ultimately be shattered when the bodies of those carrying them die as well. But we will still be alive. We will step into the next stage of life. When the lights go out we face the uncertainty of our immortality. Our souls long for truth because we know that there's more than this world and the bodies that house our souls. We have purpose. We know it. There's something out there that put us here, something that made us, and we long to connect with this being. Faith is a difficult thing in a physical world. Faith is believing in the unseen, in things not experienced. I know not to touch a hot stove not because I have faith it will burn me but because I know it will burn me from experience. The body I live in has never died before, so I can't know from experience what that's like. Yet I have faith- faith that there's a Creator of the universe that loves me and will redeem me despite of my flaws. A God that has so much more planned for me than whatever my quick years in this body on this earth will offer. When the lights go out, I'm alone in my body but not in my spirit. When the lights go out, all I need is faith.